I don't want to say goodbye

debts, bills, debts, bills.... oh boy! returned mom's ezlink card and top it up. returned dad's money. returning baby's money. bought a err... capri pants? i think tts it. a pair of capri pants from Dorothy Perkins. Caught my eye on a shirt at Esprit. Got it. Wanted to get crocs but maybe ain't gonna to. Why? It's either too small or to loose. Gonna get a pair of shoes for work, get some stocks of dvd-rs, cartridges for our printer. oh boy! Bills! Bills! Bills! My handphone bills are still booming up. But hor! I think by next month, it's gonna be booming down.

Something seems to be wrong but the way I see it, everything seems to be oKay.

Was caught all wet on Monday evening after work. Meeting up baby after almost 2 weeks of not meeting and barely talking. Went over to Nor's chalet and got ourselves staying over instead of going back and me not going to work the next day instead of going. But I felt good. I was glad that I get to spend time with my baby.
Back to work for the both of us the very next day after one day of rest. Well, it was sleep for me the whole day til night til the next morning. Went to work, everything was fine and everything was fine until yesterdae evening. I have alreadi planned. I had a plan. I was planning. I wanted to take a break this week. Did not want to do overtime BUT! oh no! oh dear! my goSh! last minute probs arrived. we have no say and yes, I had to stay for ot yesterdae. Well, actualli I had a choice of not staying yesterdae but due to my "Mulut Masin" ("Salty Mouth"), the weather changes from being very sunny to very windy and dark and to very heavy heavy rain. I stayed behind for an hour and wanted to go over work earli today but baby didnt morning call me. Oh well... Got to work at 0930hrs, which the security guard said I was very early to come for OT. wth! giLerneSs....
Felt really really tired and I cant finish my things that of course, I'll be going back work tomorrow.

is it normal? To not meeting like once a week? Is it normal to not meeting for a very long time? Barely call. Barely message. ....am i oKay? Is it me? Or is it you? Hope everything will be fine on that day.... It is so fast. Time flies. it'll be 3 months soon. ...i'm pRayiNg

i'm Not woRkiNg!

i do not know what to think. i do not know what to feel. i do not knw what to say. i do not know what to hear. i do not know what to do and i do not know where to go.

ended up not going to work today as i was dead asleep the whole night. well, actualli i slept like about 0400hrs in the wee morning. why? i don't know. had some beers down my system last night which it makes me feel great. my ex-colleagues were trying to cheer me up and stop me from taking their beers. muahaha!!! but i sneakily took some and add them into my ice tea. i was alright. i made my way back home as normal and it was a cold night and i forgot to pack my shawl with me. but it was good to meet up seong-ge and oni-jiang. seong-ge present me with a pair or studs for me leaving the company gift. that was so sweet of him. went down to ex-company b4 meeting up de dinner and it was great. meeting up the new girl. she was kind of irritating though but not as irritating as me b4. she is like more irritating.

me and seong-ge had a good talk. he adviced me about relationships. told me about his relationship. he and his wife just got married last year after 8 years of dating. Wow!
His wife, May and his sister joined us later on as they wanted to have dinner. Seong-ge told me about his sister which is really funny. He asked me if they looked alike and I said yes. Then he said, "but too bad la! I am smart and she is stupid!".... That really stuns me!
He later on told me wat actually happened and why she ended up in Singapore instead of being back home. I understood the whole picture and haha!! and no, I don't think she is stupid too but just naive.

Today, slept the whole day. Slept at about 0400hrs, I think I've alreadi mentioned that. Woke up like 12 noon. Washed me face, brushed teeth, watched Masked Rider 555, ate brunch, continued watching Masked Rider 555 then went back to sleep. Woke up ard 1930hrs. Mom woke me up.... Watched Constantine and darling smsed.... Now feeling kinda sleepy, drinking hot choc... Gonna sleep soon... Muackz everybody!

seriously! ...this is FUNNY!

move aLong

what hv i done? i dn knw... im sure it's something... hmm... maybe it's tt thing.

i had a fall yesterdae. fall on my back wif a big impact and my head hit a hard metal. wow! i went on working like as if nothing happened. i was having headache all de way though but i went on working. & then i discovered a small itchy lump on my left leg. righ below the knee. i pulled up my jeans and asked myself, "since when i was bitten!?"... my officer saw it too and shook his head. i came back, showed mom and she said it's bad. the pus is growing and de swollen is bad. de whole thg was hard. i mean, de swell. swell.. swoll, swellen, swollen... ouh! then she looked at my old wound and touched it. she said, there's still pus inside it and hv to be taken out.... she asked me to faster go shower so she could clean the wounds. instead, i took my time. b4 i showered, i peeled off de dried thing on my old wound and left it. few mins ltr, i saw blood dripping out. LOTS of them! i quickly wiped them off wif tissue. and there, i wiped de pus away. it was big and it was bloody. hahahahahaahahahaahahahahahahahaha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
anyway, after shower, mom cleaned my old wound. and when it's to de new wound, mom tried to break de pus out bt cant cz it's still growing and new... eek! i was scared!
2dae... de pus grows big. mom wanted me to go clinic bt i didnt want to. so, she break out de pus for me. USING SCISSORS! luckily it break! she cleaned de wound and nw it kinda stinging! de pain stings too when i woke up this morning....

i finalli talked to u. i didnt give up. i went on calling u and u finalli answered.... wts wrong? .... wif me?

...where are you

i'm home... yes i am.... not doing overtime today. realli tired.... yesh... took de time to finally change my layout. i guess im not a veri colorful person cz i'm cmfortable with either white or black.

....am i?.... insecure?

hhmmmmm

i am scared. i have a tendency of forgetting something once i'm into something else. i have not seen u for long and i felt i have forgotten ur existence. how u look like and how you are, i felt i have forgotten them. no words from you makes me forgot where you are and here i am thinking of something that i feel something was missing. whether it is something i could see or something i could not.

the ongs from Chronicles Of Narnia are really nice. i love them. I don't realli fancy classical music much but this instrumental songs, erm... what they call it... the scores. yes, the scores of these movies are realli nice. Memoirs Of Geisha's nice to and Pirates Of Carribean.

oKay... I want to watch Chronicles Of Narnia again... & I want Turkish Delight.... it may be a little late to say that though... hehe

Memoirz

updates! updates!

met out wif my gal, Nana after work on thursday night and friday night. stayed for OT on Wednesday. it was a rainy day... no, evening actualli. so, it was cooling all de way on de way back.

on thursday night, met up wif gal Nana over at np. she wanted wanted to show me something and wanted my advice. i was wondering what is it she wanted and there she was, showing her new hairstyle and what she wanted was to knw what wax to put on her hair.... haha... got her to get Lucidol or Gatsby but Loreal's good too but it's expensive though... but she wants Loreal but oh well..... Went over to starbucks and had a chat. it's been long we've not meet up.

on friday, companied her for shopping over at Dorothy Perkins and had dinner at Burger King. the service was slow that more people came in when me and Nana came in. It was absurd and the stupid manager who was serving me was trying her best to be as nice as possible, which is good but her serving were getting so slow.... too slow as possible. slow slow slow.... and de couples behind me were getting irritating. they sound cute but they got too irritating especialli with that lady manager was serving me slow.

Came back to work on friday. it was a good morning. a good start at work but it was getting all frustrating later on. In the evening, went over to sallyn's. Companied her and Af at home. played with Af and we ordered in McD as sallyn have not eaten yet. Af was so lovable that he was so cheery all day that the adrenaline in me was happy too.

went to work today. i was alone most of the time. the radio could be tuned in the instrument room but cant in the office, which was frustrating. start my day with a frustrating one and it was smooth bit by bit later on.... planned to work less than 8 hrs but seems like i did more than that.

going back tomorrow to finally wrap things up. i could wrap things up today but my body was too tired.

im home now. had dinner straight away. mee rebus wif half-boiled egg. haha!!! yah! mom thought the eggs were boiled but when i break it opened, it was half-boiled and everything jz dropped into my mee rebus.... and oh well... add green chillies... NICEY!

now im thinking of watching a movie.... am gonna go shower 1st but b4 tt want to set my bed and hang out the laundries....

2 great movies in 2 days..... next?

Chronicles Of Narnia..... breathless.....

Memoirs Of Geisha..... breathtaking.....

what's next?

maybe War of The World ......

Amazing

Sunday... tt day was de best day of my life. i mean, it was like de most happiest day of my life. i dn knw y but i felt so happy tt day. although i was tired.

went to work on sunday morning. onli for a few hours. met baby and kama after tt. onli for awhile and then went over to baby's place. rested and waited for baby to shower and change. lil bro, sufi alreadi ready. we played and talked and off we went to The Cathay to get tixs for Ice Age 2. had to give a miss to the event at Ngee Ann City as shasha was there. there wasnt any time and they finished earli. so, b4 de movie, went down for lunch at swensen where me and sufi realli had fun tt we were reprimanded by baby for being naughty and noisy. hehehe.... played, chatted, time goes by and we had to rushed eating. well, me and sufi were almost finished while baby was still struggling with his chickens. muahaha!!! no time for ice-cream as promised to sufi. once we were done, off we go for the movie. We got there in time. yay! thank goodness we were not late. Sufi was given a stool to sit on. It was his 1st time in the cinema. Asked lots of questions too and he couldn't sit still. Lots of fidgeting ard. He kept turning around, standing up, sitting on my lap and back forth to his seat.

After de movie, sufi reminded us to go for ice-cream. haha!!! smart kid he is..... kids. well... they remember everything the adults would tell them. ...and so we went dwn to Marina's Secret Recipe where i got him ice-cream. he was like the happiest kid in de world and i was so happy. he spoon-fed me his ice-cream but forgetting his brother tt i told him to spoon-feed his brother too.... haha....
later on, brought him up to Kiddy Palace just to walk ard and he found something tt he wants bt i promised him tt we'll get it de next day... tt's when baby told me tt i shouldnt hv said tt cz little kid would remember such things. i was hoping he'll not. me and baby were tired by then cz we both were from after work, so we decided to bring him for some games at suntec but which tower, we forgot. we went dwn suntec and up we went to the top floor and there was the one place tt we were trying to avoid. me and baby couldnt bear to m8k a turn cz there wasnt any where to turn too... and once sufi turns, there he saw the big name... Toys' R Us.... aiyoh!
we had no choice but to bring him in for a little while... he found something he wanted too but i had to twist ard words wif him tt i finally got him out of toys' r us .... muahaha... and off to home we went.....
while we going out, in de train, sufi was on my lap, sleeping and baby was beside me sitting. going back time, sufi was on baby's lap, sleeping and me in baby's arm, sleeping .....mueehehe!!! baby said ppl were looking at him and he was feeling a little weird, plus, seeing de both of us sleeping so soundly.... hehehe.... i felt so good....
went back to baby's, rested for awhile b4 gg back home..... i realli had a great day and i realli love to have it again....

on monday, work sucks. my senior officer wasn't ard and my officer asst was trying to find things for me to do.... sigh.... i was sleepy and tired de whole day too......
got back home straight away. showered, dinner.... & Chronicles of Narnia... finalli.... it was nice. i love de music. it's nice.... i love...

Memoirs of Geisha tonight....

I want to take up driving lesson too le....

baby! I love you!....

i want to spend my lifetime loving you - tina arena & marc anthony

Moon so bright, night so fine, Keep your heart here with mine Life's a dream we are dreaming
Race the moon, catch the wind, Ride the night to the end, Seize the day, stand up for the light
I want to spend my lifetime loving you If that is all in life I ever do

Heroes rise, heroes fall, Rise again, win it all, In your heart, can't you feel the glory?
Through our joy, through our pain, We can move worlds again Take my hand, dance the dance with me

I want to spend my lifetime loving you If that is all in life I ever do I will want nothing else to see me through If I can spend my lifetime loving you

Though we know we will never come again Where there is love, life begins Over and over again
Save the night, save the day, Save the love, come what may, Love is worth everything we pay

Every & Mr. V ......

baby's favorite quote from V For Vendetta .....
Remember, remember, the fifth of November, The gunpowder treason and plot. I know of no reason why the gunpowder treason should ever be forgot.

my favorite quote from V For Vendetta .....
Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of Fate. This visage, no mere veneer of vanity, is it vestige of the vox populi, now vacant, vanished, as the once vital voice of the verisimilitude now venerates what they once vilified. However, this valorous visitation of a by-gone vexation, stands vivified, and has vowed to vanquish these venal and virulent vermin van-guarding vice and vouchsafing the violently vicious and voracious violation of volition. The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose vis-à-vis an introduction, and so it is my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V.

a very nice quote though, from V For Vendetta .....
A revolution without dancing...is a revolution not worth having!

i think i want to watch the movie again. V For Vendetta. we didn't find it appealing though but i want to watch it again. i want to understand again what they were saying. i couldnt concentrate well as i was from after work. de whole movie's all politic, i think though but i's a nice movie with nice words going ard.....

did OT again on thursday night. like so syok like tt. went off as de laSt peRsoN..... now routine back to normal. come back home after work, eat dinner, shower.... muehehehe......

gonna watch ice age 2 tomorrow. yay!

.......Quotes taken from http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0434409/quotes

...when you'Re not deRe

overtimed for the past 2 days. had lunch outside for de past 2 days. yup! with new colleagues. apparently, i can never make friends easily wif gals but wif de guys instead. now, im hanging out de guys. a new set of guys. bah! well, now got members ar! siti!

whatever! crapness.... madNesS!

felt good doing overtime. felt good going to work again & i seem to miss the Instrument Room. I love being in there and I hate sitting at my deSk. 3 weeks, stiLL gettiNg to kNw pPL there. sLowly goNna buiLd up some new frensheepz.... muaahaha!!! aPa saJeR siTi saRiNah....

baBy caLLed @ woRk ....it waS dE SHWEETEST phoNecaLL i eVeR reCeiVed!!!!!

baBy... miSsNg yOu......

listening to hoobstank's running away

before it's midnight, before i go to slp. i want to blog. yes ar!...

anyway, i think i had a good day today but not so good. it was more like a free day. i was more to asking ard if there's anything to do rather than de de job is given to me to do. my officer was busy de whole day wif de new project tt he got his asst to to get me to assist him yes i did. he taught me some reports and it was merely of waitings. i was practically waiting and asking him if there are any or is there any report/reports he wnts to teach me and do. everytime i have to wait, not knowing that he was exporting those reports for me. my boss was there walking ard and back and forth to his desk which is directly in front of me and de general manager whose room is behind me and he keeps coming in and out today.... i was desperately wanting to do something that i kept bugging my officer asst for more reports to give me. and he kept on saying de reports are still being export to excel and thati have to wait. by the time i got them, it was already 1600hrs+ and i can onli do them halfway cz i was in no mood to stay behind. pLus, it was raining and if i stayed, who knows it might get rainy again later on an i would have to wait again.

after work, i dragged meself to woodlands civic. went to the library, got a book and then off to pharmacy to get something..... off to bik as's place after that to get my baju kurungs. yup! each for S$28. blue and brown. diff colors but same flowers..... mueeheheheheheeh!!!!

came back home with grandma.... now feeling sleepy... talking with my boyfren right now... going to sleep soon.... muackz!

seMuSiM

......everything were good. everything went well. now we are all just waiting. waiting and being patient is just the onli best thing we could do right now. pray to god and wait for the moment. hope for the best. hope for the good. hope tt everything will be alright.

had a great talk, had a great time, had a great day... felt so tired. turned in quite earli and got up real earli.

things were great. helped dad carried de pLasma which mom ltr got so worked up. met baby for dinner and spent a little more time. he came up to my front door as i wanted to pass him something. mom was stunned tt she ran off but told her he's onli waiing outside as im not asking him to come in.... muahaha!!! it was a funni incident ar.

talked wif mom and she's worked up again abt me helping dad carried de pLasma from my room and to the living room. she's too worried over and my dad... sigh.....

we hit 2 mths and @ de same time, i was hit by a passing bicycle... bLueKz